Please note that the content and viewpoints of Mr. Hansen are his own and are not necessarily those of the C.S. Lewis Foundation. We have not edited his writing in any substantial way and have permission from him to post his content.

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Dear Friends:

The Greek writer Nikos Kazantzakis wrote a story in which an old man, broken, sick and tormented of spirit, is dying alone in a hut. He is filthy with the residue of a life of sin, much of its sexual. He is afraid of the gathering darkness and his fate and cries out to Christ for help and forgiveness. A light comes into the dim hut and Jesus appears with a basin of water and towels. He carefully and tenderly washes the soiled and shameful old man until he is clean. Then Jesus tosses the now filthy towels into the corner turns to the astonished old man and says, “See, all is well. Now go on and play.”

The story is faithful to the Spirit of Jesus Christ who told a shamed and frightened woman, “‘Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?'” She said, ‘No one, sir’ And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now on do not sin again” (Jn 8:10-11).

It has been my privilege over the years to bring the message of God’s love to men and women tormented by their past and frightened by their future. I have known them to weep in relief when I introduced them to the truth of Philippians 1:6: “I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work in you will bring it to completion by the day of Christ Jesus.” I tell them–

“Jesus says, ‘Do not let your hearts be troubled. Believe in God, believe also in me. In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go to prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, so that where I am, there you may be also. . . I will not leave you orphaned; I am coming to you. In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me; because I live, you also will live'” (Jn 14:1-3, 18-19).

The power of this overcoming love grew in my understanding this week as I thought about the story of Moses. By Friday, I couldn’t help sharing the story with friends, who all smiled and laughed to hear again the extent of God’s sheltering, completing grace. Because whatever your particular story, we all need grace to get us home from where our story has taken us. So here’s the story for you. . . .

It’s been a hard journey–40 years of success, 40 years of exile and 40 years of wandering everywhere but a straight line. Enormous challenges were surmounted along the way and much good has been accomplished. He has seen the best of God and the worst of himself. Mistakes were also made and sins committed–impetuous sins, well-intended in his self-righteous pride and anger, but murderous and destructive in their impact.

Now comes the day of reckoning on the mountain. There are consequences. There are always consequences. To deny that our choices and actions have consequences is to nonsensically deny our created existence. Moses has an unvarnished understanding of consequences. He has already ruefully observed that his fate is entirely in God’s hands–

Who considers the power of your anger?
Your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you.
So teach us to number our days
that we may gain a wise heart.

Ps 90:11-12

Moses had his reasons for what he did before he thought about the consequences. His lot was cast with a stubborn, fearful, whining people in a dry, barren wasteland. It is maddeningly frustrating to offer the vision of peace and permanent prosperity at the end of the road, only to have them bicker and demand the instant gratification of better grazing rights, accessible water holes and dietary variety, in the desert no less!

Moses has killed a man for quick justice and spent 40 years chasing sheep through the wilderness regretting the impulse. He has faced-off a fickle mob by shattering a precious gift received from the hand of God. He has mediated their squabbles to the point of exhaustion, taken taunts about his spouse, his wisdom, his fitness for leadership. His advice was often ignored and his judgment disputed.

They were close to the goal when his sister died. Miriam, who saved his life at birth, and who danced and sang on the day their Egyptian oppressors were defeated, was gone. Sure, she had her faults, but those were long gone. It is one of God’s blessings that grief tends to remember only the good and forget the worst.

They were in a dry place at that time. The people were hot and thirsty and critical. They needled Moses and Aaron about the fool’s errand they had brought them on. The Lord offered his grace and said, “Just a word from you with my power will silence them and satisfy them,” but the old temper emerged with sarcasm. “Listen you rebels, shall we bring water for you out of this rock?” (Num 20:10).

Moses peevishly smacked the rock with his stick as if God’s power was his right and possession rather than the holy grace of the burning bush. It had worked before, hadn’t it? He had the gift, didn’t he? Water gushed out of the rock, but Moses knew immediately in the depths of his soul that he was wrong.

God doesn’t stand for his grace being misrepresented by those he places in leadership of his people. Neither does he reward human effort and force as an alternative to trusting in him. “The Lord said to Moses and Aaron, ‘Because you did not trust in me, to show my holiness before the eyes of the Israelites, therefore you shall not bring this assembly into the land that I have given them” (Num 20:12).

Power belongs to God and we are only the easel for the display of his glory and tender mercies. If we claim that we, ourselves, are the source of his gifts then we forfeit the infinite possibilities of the Giver as our hope. In that case, we are then destined to roam the salvage yards of humanism and legalism in the vain search for the missing parts of our salvation.

Moses and Aaron had the choice that comes to each of us when we are dying of thirst “between a rock and a hard place.” Do we trust in God’s providence and obey his word to us, or, do we try to force the issue in our own way?

God, in his mercy, does not deny his people grace because of the mistakes of their leaders. If God were to do so, it would place the leaders between the people and God. The people are likely to use their leaders like a human shield out of craven fear. God, for his part, wants a direct relationship with us (Compare Ex 20:19 with Jer 31:31-34 and Heb 8:8-12). In the Lord’s mercy for the thirst of the people, “water came out abundantly, and the congregation and their livestock drank” (Num 20:11).

The moment passed, but the blighting shadow of its disappointing failure lingered. The journey continued from this point for many more difficult years of trial and tragedy until the people are ready to enter the land. The bittersweet reckoning has arrived.

Moses leaves the plains of Moab and climbs the rugged ridge of Mount Nebo to the highest point called Mount Pisgah He can see into the Canaan and a good stretch of the valley of the Jordan. The west wind is fresh in his face off of the Mediterranean glinting in the far distance. The wind’s sound in the pines at the summit is the familiar sound of the Spirit that he heard first at the burning bush so many years before.

The Promised Land spreads out before him as the Lord speaks to his heart. “This is the land of which I swore to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants’; I have let you see it with your own eyes, but you shall not cross over there” (Deut 34:4).

It is over as he knew it would be when he prayed,

Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations. . .

from everlasting to everlasting you are God.

.

You turn us back to dust. . .

our years come to an end with a sigh.

The days of our life are seventy years,

or perhaps eighty, if we are strong;

even then their span is only toil and trouble;

they are gone and we fly away. . . .

He had ended this prayer with his hope for more.

Turn, O Lord! How long?

Have compassion on your servants!

Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love,

so that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.

Make us glad as many days as you have afflicted us,

and as many years as we have seen evil.

Let your work be manifest to your servants,

and your glorious power to their children.

Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us,

and prosper for us the work of our hands–

O prosper the work of our hands!

Ps 90:1, 2b-3, 9b-10,

Yes, there are consequences to be sure, but “where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that, just as sin exercised dominion in death, so grace might also exercise dominion through justification leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ out Lord” (Rom 5:20). The old man who brought the law down the mountain now finds grace at the end on the mountain. God himself tenderly sees to his burial in mystery, even as his fickle people mourn with weeping on the plains below (Deut 34:6-8).

We may find it tragic, even unfair, from a human standpoint that Moses came so far not to realize the gift himself. But you and I whose hearts are ever subject to being gnawed at by guilt and regret, who weep for shame and doubt over past sins and appalling mistakes of judgment, and who bind ourselves tightly against inadequacy, loss, and resentments, need to take note.

God could have shown Moses many things on Mount Pisgah. He could have revisited and hashed over the murder of the Egyptian, the shattered tablet, the burning shame of the rock struck in anger. God could have tweaked Moses’ conscience and questioned his legacy for the violence encountered on the journey, the raging reaction to the Golden Calf, decisions made, paths taken or not taken. Many men and women have second-guessed and argued gracelessly about those things since then.

But God doesn’t say any of those things to Moses. Instead, he shows Moses the future of peace and delight ahead for the people that Moses loved, a future made possible by Moses’ faithful service. In that sweeping view from the mountain, God displays the ultimate truth of grace–

The Lord is merciful and gracious,

slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

He will not always accuse,

nor will he keep his anger forever.

He does not deal with us according to our sins,

nor repay us according to our iniquities.

For as the heavens are high above the earth,

so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;

as far as the east is from the west;

so far he removes our transgressions from us.

As a father has compassion for his children,’

so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him.

For he knows how we were made;

he remembers that we are dust.

Ps 103:8-14

“Yes, mistakes were made that cost you the gift,” God tells his servant Moses in essence, “but it didn’t cost you the Giver. I love you and I am taking you home with me.” We know this to be true because the next time Moses is seen on earth it is on another mountain across the way in the Promised Land, a mountain that he would have seen from Mount Pisgah. Moses is with Elijah and they are talking with Jesus to encourage him in his mission of salvation (Mk 9:4).

The point of all of this is to be with Jesus Christ forever. We have our shortcomings, but he reaches for our hand and takes us all the way home. That’s the testimony of Moses to those of us who are grim and morose over our sins and mistakes. “The law indeed was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ” (Jn 1:17). Moses died and lives eternally in that grace and truth. So can we. Believe it!

“O taste and see that the Lord is good. Happy are they who take refuge in him.”

Under the mercy of Christ,

Kent

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Kent Hansen is a Christian attorney, author and speaker. He practices corporate law and is the managing attorney of the firm of Clayson, Mann, Yaeger & Hansen in Corona, California. Kent also serves as the general counsel of Loma Linda University and Medical Center in Loma Linda, California.

Finding God’s grace revealed in the ordinary experiences of life, spiritual renewal in Christ and prayer are Kent’s passions. He has written two books, Grace at 30,000 Feet and Other Unexpected Places published by Review & Herald in 2002 and Cleansing Fire, Healing Streams: Experiencing God’s Love Through Prayer, published by Pacific Press in spring 2007. Many of his stories and essays about God’s encompassing love have been published in magazines and journals. Kent is often found on the hiking trails of the southern California mountains, following major league baseball, playing the piano or writing his weekly email devotional, “A Word of Grace for Your Monday” that is read by men and women from Alaska to Zimbabwe.

Kent and his beloved Patricia are enjoying their 31st year of marriage. They are the proud parents of Andrew, a college student.