Warning: the post you are about to read is a satiric message in the spirit of C.S. Lewis’ The Screwtape Letters.
My dear Wormwood,
Our Father Below has just notified me concerning a matter of positively grave concern. The American humans are currently producing a “theater adaptation” of our embarrassing correspondence that the infernal Oxford don “Jack” Lewis somehow absconded with during the war in the 40’s. Now our plans stand to be thwarted at an even greater capacity than we previously thought possible! Once again we are forced to try to mitigate this catastrophe.
See the details below, in a pamphlet our intelligence has obtained:
THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS, the provocative and wickedly funny theatrical adaptation of the C.S. Lewis novel about spiritual warfare from a demon’s point of view will begin performances at the Westside Theatre, 407 West 43rd Street, New York, on April 15. The production stars award-winning actors Max McLean and Karen Eleanor Wight and has been a smash hit in cities throughout the country including Chicago, San Francisco and Washington, D.C. Critics described THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS as “Smart, Sizzling Entertainment!” (Chicago Sun-Times), “Boils Over With Wit!” (The Washington Times), and “Pure Genius!!” (National Review).
April 15th – May 2nd – Preview Performances
Mondays through Thursdays and Sunday evenings: $35.00
Fridays through Sunday matinees: $45.00
May 4th – May 31st – Performance weeks
Mondays through Thursdays and Sunday evenings: $45.00
Fridays through Sunday matinees: $55.00
To redeem discount, call Telecharge at 212-947-8844 or 800-872-8997 or visit Broadwayoffers.com. Mention code SLNH104. For discount group tickets, call 1-866-GROUP07. Please print out a copy of this offer and present at the box office when picking up tickets.
Box office hours are 12 p.m.-6 p.m. daily. The box office accepts VISA, MASTERCARD, AMERICAN EXPRESS, DISCOVER and CASH, as in-person methods of payment. Sorry, no checks at the box office for window sales. Tickets are subject to availability and discounts are limited. Regular service charges apply to phone and internet orders. May not be combined with any other offer or discounts. This offer not applicable to previously purchased tickets. No refunds or exchanges. All sales are final. Offer may be revoked at any time. OFFER EXPIRES April 15, 2010.
The Westside Theatre
407 West 43rd Street (between 9th and 10th Avenues)
New York, NY 10036
Wormwood, I expect you to be present at the premier and every performance after for the next one hundred years, or else we’ll have another ‘incident.’
Your affectionate Uncle,
Undersecretary of Temptership